'I still cannot believe you just went in there to see her' I fumed as we got back to the studio, I'd only just managed to hold it in until we left the cafe.
'We had to see who this internet femme fatale was for ourselves' laughed Joe
'She actually does seem like a good person though, she came across quite humble and was totally normal with us' said Kevin.
‘And she does make a good cup of Joe’ laughed my eternally unfunny brother Joe.
'I wondered where the car was this morning when I came down and then I questioned where you two clowns were but now I know. And you said I was stalking her! What do you guys call what you just did?' I demanded.
'It's so obvious you like each other though Nick, why don't you just bite the bullet and ask her out properly?' Asked Kevin.
'Because she lives in London and I'm based in LA and travelling all over the world constantly, how would that work? Don't you think I've thought about it? She's the only girl I've really felt anything for in a long time and it just can't happen. Even though all I want to do every time I see her is grab her and kiss her. Every time I get a minute I want to talk to her. When I close my eyes she's who I see. I even dream about her. Okay happy now' I said, surprising myself at my outburst. It was the first time I’d even admitted those things to myself.
Their eyes were huge in surprise. They looked at each other and back at me and laughed.
'You're in love bro' said Kevin punching me on the arm.
'You've got it bad' added Joe, 'wait til I tell Soph she was right'
'Yeah well she also has a boyfriend so it doesn't matter even if I was in love with her, which I'm not'
'Ah the sweet sound of denial in the morning dear brother' laughed Joe.
'Maybe if you put as much effort into recording these damn songs as you did trying to wind me up about Lucy then the album would have been done by now' I answered storming past them, only making them laugh harder.
What the hell did they know? I huffed to myself. And even if I was in love with her, what was the point. It couldn't ever work, could it? So why was she the only person in the world I wanted to talk to about it? Without really thinking it through, I picked up the phone and text Lula.
'Have you ever really fallen for someone, knowing it can't happen but you just can't help it?'
I pressed send. I saw those three dots appear almost instantly.
'Yeah, I have, but we've only ever text each other and he lives in the USA so it's complicated. LOL. God I hope that's what you meant or I sound like a total idiot'
I rubbed my head in my hands, she'd fallen for me too but she just didn't know it was me. Why hadn't I told her. If I say no to that then I lose her and make things awkward but if I agree then she might not give the real me a second glance. That’s what I liked about her, she didn’t see me as Nick Jonas. She saw me as the real Nick.This was one fubar situation.
I pressed send on the text and instantly regretted it. I'd just told him I'd fallen for him like a complete weirdo, and what was worse he wasn't replying. I’d clearly got it wrong. I just hoped I hadn’t lost him as a friend for good.
I spent all day hoping he'd message me back but nothing. Complete silence all day. I'd messed up. I had lost him and it hurt, it really hurt. At least I had my night out with Josh to look forward to and seeing Nick perform for the first time was going to be cool too.
'So Josh, will I do for my first ever Jonas Brothers gig?' I laughed spinning around.
'If Nick Jonas doesn't throw you over his shoulder and kidnap you for his sex slave dressed like that then he's just plain stupid' he joked
'And if Joe Jonas doesn't do the same to you, then I'll have to have strong words with him' I laughed back at him.
I'd decided that I was going to put the sadness to one side and enjoy myself tonight. I dressed up as Josh promised me that he and I were going to hit the town after the show. He was going to help me drown my sorrows. He kept saying 'can you lose something you never really had in the first place' and maybe he had a point. So why did my hands feel empty without my phone and why was there was a void in my heart without his words?
At the gig we entered through the VIP entrance as Nick has instructed and strolled into the bar area like we owned that place. At the bar we stopped to take stock of our surroundings. There were so many people I recognised from celebrity magazines in there that I was shocked. It wasn't that I'd expected to be there alone with Nick but I was pretty sure that I'd just seen Victoria Beckham and her daughter. Oh wow! I felt like a total imposter. I was sure people were looking at me and wondering who I was and if I'd got the wrong entrance.
A large security guy appeared.
'Is there a Lucy and Josh here?' He asked. Everyone looked at each other, I was mortified.
'We're over here' shouted Josh waving to the guy.
'Can you come with me please' he asked.
I downed the drink that I'd literally just been handed and followed him. If I was about to be chucked out then I wanted at least one free drink. He took us through a cordoned off area and knocked on the door marked
'Nick Jonas Dressing Room'
'Come in' I heard him shout and the security guy pushed the handle and let us in. Nick was sat on a sofa getting ready for the show.
‘Hi Lucy’ Nick said.
'Hey, thanks again for the tickets' I said with a smile.
'Thanks again for coming' he said eyeing Josh suspiciously. 'I take it this is Josh, your boyfriend?' He asked awkwardly.
Josh and I took one look at each other and burst out laughing. Nick looked confused.
'Haha, I'm sorry Nick but you're more my type than she is, if you get what I'm saying. I'm gay! I'm just her flat mate. She's completely single and ready to mingle' said Josh giving me a hug and aiming a wink at Nick.
'But he does prefer Joe' I joked, embarrassed that he'd just emphasised to Nick that I was single.
'Well I'm about to do my warmups so I'm going to have to say bye for now, but I just wanted to catch you and say that I hope you enjoy the show. And remember your passes for afterwards'
'Well we'll be able to come back for a while but I'm taking Lucy out to cheer her up afterwards, she's had a falling out with a friend' explained Josh.
'We're actually going out to a club afterwards, why don't you hang around and come with us?' Nick smiled.
'That's really kind but...' I began
'But nothing, count us in' said Josh excitedly whooping.