I can't believe I told Jez that I owned a vibrator last night. Even though I'd never meet him it was still embarrassing, he'd seemed totally cool about it though which made it better though. That's what I meant about him being easy to talk to. It just flowed and there was never even any real regret.
I'd felt sad when the writing course ended, there were other people on there that I would have loved to have kept in touch with but none I wanted to have my personal details that I had shared so willingly with Jez. He hadn't turned up with an axe to kill me yet so I took that as a success.
Today was going to be a slog with this mix of exhaustion and hangover. It was just a relief that I had unlimited free coffee at work or I doubted I'd have survived the morning. I decided that if I made it to the end of the day that I would treat myself with my favourite Chinese food. Josh would be working but my friend Anna would be free and I could do with a bit of girly time.
I'd managed to make it to the end of my shift and made it to uni in time for lunchtime. Next on the agenda was making it through a double politics lecture, without either sleeping or vomiting. I went to the canteen and found Josh and his friends. There were a couple of cute ones but I was sure they saw me as one of the boys. They were all sports studies students and so muscular and fit, it was just nice to look at them but sometimes conversation was a bit over my head.
'Hey Lucy' said Josh's friend Derek moving his bag so I could sit next to him. 'How's your day been?'
'It might have been better if I didn't have work at 8am and you guys hadn't kept up so late and made me do so many shots' I groaned.
'If you come out with the boys, you have to keep up with the boy's' Josh joked.
'Excuse me I did quite well, and anyway, you know I'm an honorary lad now' I contested.
'True, so how about the Chelsea score last night?' He asked in general, and I zoned out. The English premier league wasn't a specialist subject. I took the opportunity to check my phone and I found a message from Jez.
'How's the hangover? Today?'
'I'm officially broken. I actually want nothing more than to hide under my duvet but instead I've just finished work and I'm at uni for the rest of the day'
'Serves you right for being so smart. I didn't get to go to uni. I wish I had'
'I love it here, don't get me wrong but just not with a hangover. Actually it wasn't easy for me to come either'
'Yeah, my mum and dad split up just as I was about to sit my exams and I took it badly. I nearly failed but a teacher helped me through them. Then because my dad had left my mum really couldn't afford to pay for me to go to uni so I took a couple of years out to work to save up and here I am, working like mad to pay for it all myself but I think that makes me work harder because I don't want to waste the money. I don't see my dad anymore which is tough though'
'You've been through a lot but I can relate, my parents went through a really rough time financially and it was hard on us all. I started working young and felt a lot of pressure to help support us but it worked out in the end and my parents are still together. It really made me who I am today and I think that's why I always try and work so hard. I'm scared that the same will happen to me'
'I think as long as you've got love in your life and the right people around you then you can get through anything. A friend on the end of a text also helps ;-)'
'Where do you see yourself in the future? I mean what's next and beyond that'
'Well I'm starting to give up on Prince Charming coming to rescue me from my life of servitude. My dream growing up was always to get married and live happily ever after with a man like my dad but I've had to re-evaluate that idea. I guess he's the reason I have trust issues with men. That's why I like you, you don't make false promises that you can't keep.
In terms of what's next, I'm looking at masters degrees, potentially abroad but I'm not sure. I guess the world will be my oyster. I'd love to travel too. What about you?'
'I'm just going to keep working with my brothers for the time being and then who knows, we have to travel a lot and sometimes it's overrated. Just keep believing your Prince Charming is out there, you deserve to be happy'
'You do know that some people referred to Ted Bundy as a Prince Charming don't you?!? Be careful what you wish for! Anyway I need to go, speak later x'
'I'll be waiting for your text x'
'Lucy? Earth to Lucy!' Said Josh
'Sorry what?' I looked up at him.
'Lunch is finished, Time for double politics' he laughed, knowing the pain it would cause me.
'See you soon Lucy' Derek called after me and I gave him a wave.
I walked to class imagining Jez as my Prince Charming coming to carry my out of my lecture to save me from Professor Laing and his monotone voice, but he never arrived. Damn you Jez for getting my hopes up I laughed to myself as the second hour began.