'Look at the picture that Lucy just sent, what do you think to her hair and make up?' I asked her Grandad. He nodded in approval.
'She looks just like Lucy, just like she should do. It's perfect' he replied. Honestly Lucy's grandad was like my guru. If he thought she'd like something then that was almost a guarantee that she would.
We were currently in Hugo Boss collecting our suits. I'd chosen a tight fitted dark navy blue suit, with matching waistcoat, a white shirt and a navy tie. I thought it would compliment her dress perfectly. Holding the suit in the carrier gave me a 'oh wow this is really happening moment' there was literally 2 more days to our wedding.
I thought back to when I had the big idea of a surprise wedding. Lucy and I were in Australia, as part of the Jonas Brothers tour. We were sightseeing and ended up in a little town in the middle of nowhere, largely because of Lucy's inability to listen to a sat nav, but I digress. We went into the old fashioned town store to buy drinks and there was a lovely old couple running the store. They had no idea who I was but they were so kind and friendly. Lucy being Lucy, we ended up talking to them for a long time and the woman had noticed her engagement ring. She'd asked when the wedding was planned for and Lucy had replied that I was so busy with work that I just didn't have the time to plan it yet. The woman had looked me in the eye and told me that I needed to look at my priorities, make sure to put Lucy first and to marry her before someone else snapped her up. That's what planted the seed.
It felt like Groundhog Day. I woke up with a slight hangover and cuddled into Nick, but as soon as he woke up he started making excuses for why we couldn't spend time together AGAIN today. This whole week it felt like he was missing or making me promises he didn't keep. He'd never been like this before and I was starting to worry. I’d never felt anxious about our relationship before but thinking about all the sneaking around he was doing and secret phone calls he kept leaving the room to take was messing with my head. Was he seeing someone else?
When I'd met his ex Olivia at an event months back she'd told me frostily that he'd get fed up of me once the novelty of me being ‘normal’ wore off and leave me for someone else; like he had done to her. I'd told her that I didn't believe her and that I trusted him, but maybe some doubt was starting to creep in, no matter how hard I tried to push it aside.
I beat Nick into the shower but he came and sat in the bathroom whilst I was in. We were talking about the night before and he was full of how he'd enjoyed himself. They'd started off in a private gentleman's club for dinner, then the four brothers had ended up in a club together and got a bit wild. There were even photos on gossip sites of him that I'd already seen, letting loose without me.
In all honesty, my night had been pretty good too, we'd gone to a Broadway show and dinner. Dani and Sophie had wanted to go out afterwards but I'd refused. I’d wanted to come home to see Nick but in the end didn't get home until after I’d fallen asleep.
'So, I'm thinking we could go ice skating later today? I've seen it in the movies and it looks so romantic, please?' I was almost begging him.
'Actually, I need to go with Joe to pick up Sophie's present and then there's a few errands I need to do. I should be back by 3:30 though' he explained.
'Oh okay, I think I might go shopping with my Mum then, cheer myself up and spend some time with her' I sighed.
'Cheer yourself up?' He raised his eyebrows. 'I thought you were happy?' He asked if my insecurities and frustrations were a revelation.
'I'm just missing you, we're always together and then this week you just seem too busy for me. This is Christmas Eve Eve and I'm spending it without you'
He looked at his feet and I could see he was taking in what I had said.
'I'm sorry. I promise I’ll...' he began, but I cut him off.
'Stop, every time this week you've said that its never happened, so just don't even say it' I said coming out of the shower. He walked over to me and put his hands around me, ignoring the fact that I was soaking wet.
'I love you Lucy. It's just a crazy week, and I didn't realise how you were feeling but I do now. I'll try harder to be more organised and I will be home for ice skating later. You and me a proper date night? Just the two of us?' He raised his eyebrows hopefully with a cheeky grin on his face. It melted me. How could I stay annoyed with him for any length of time.
'You know, we're all alone now. We could both jump in the shower for 5 minutes' I hinted. We hadn't had any proper alone time for ages.
He closed his eyes and I knew what was coming. 'I cant. I'm sorry. I want to, I really want to believe me but I need to leave soon or Joe will kill me'
I groaned and sighed. 'Okay, but Christmas Day better be amazing to make up for all of this'
'I promise' he said
'No more promises' I said, walking back into the bedroom, leaving him to his shower.
I had no idea she felt so abandoned, I've just been so busy getting everything ready for the wedding. Today, amongst other errands, I had to go to Central Park to see the venue that they were setting up for our vows. I'd sent them over plans of what I was hoping for and I just wanted to make sure it was perfect. I just needed to get home on time to spend the night with Lucy so she didn't get suspicious and to stop her worrying.
I’d arranged to meet Dad, Joe and Kevin at the park then we'd have lunch and make sure I'd not forgotten anything. I was starting to think the wedding planner might have been a good idea after all, but no one knew us like I did and that’s what I wanted this wedding to capture.
At the park I wasn’t disappointed, the set up was even better then I’d imagined it would be and even though the finishing touches were still to be made, I have to admit I felt choked up standing there on the spot, where in two days time, we’d be saying I do.
‘You know Nick, when you told me your plans to get married here, I wasn’t sure. I thought to myself in the middle of the park? Is he crazy? But I get it now and it’s beautiful. Both the wedding, and the love you two have for each other’ my Dad said from nowhere.
‘She’s going to love this’ said Joe with a smile.
I was just about to call and ask Kevin, Dani and the girls if they wanted to go skating instead of Nick since he was almost an hour late. I still hadn't heard from him and to say I was pissed was an understatement. I consoled myself with the fact that I hadn't got to spend much time with the girls since they got here so it was a good back up plan. Just as I was about to pick up the phone however, Nick ran in.
'I'm here, I'm here' he said, he looked really flustered.
'About time!' I snipped at him.
'I'm just going to get changed and we'll go' he reassured me. He kissed me on the cheek and a sigh left me involuntarily.
'You know I love you, don't you?' He asked and I nodded. I looked into his eyes and knew it.
‘And I love you too, but I might not for very much longer if you don’t get ready to go’ I said with mock seriousness.
Luckily it didn’t take him long to change, and we said goodbye to everyone and headed out on our date. We walked through the streets of New York hand in hand, he was pointing out some of the sights and things I should know seeing as this was still only my second time in the city. The weather was cold, but there was only a slight sprinkle of snow on the ground which was disappointing. I was desperate for a proper white Christmas but so far the signs weren’t looking good.
We got to the Rockefeller Center and stepped out on to the ice, both slightly wobbly from lack of practise, but we quickly found our feet. Soon enough we were chasing each other around on the ice and larking around just like we normally do. I started to feel bad, I’d been really negative with him and all he’d been doing was working. I went ahead of him, expecting him to chase me, and catch me, but when I turned around to see where he was, he was stood at the side of the rink on his phone again. I started to skate back towards him, but he held up his hand for me to stay back. I felt so hurt, there clearly was something that he wasn’t telling me. I continued to skate around trying work out what might be going on, but when I caught back up to him he had a serious look on his face. I knew where this was going.
‘I’m really sorry Lucy, I have to go. Something big had happened and I need to fix it. I need to go right now, so get a cab back to the apartment and I’ll see you there later’ he said, then kissed my forehead and all but ran away before I could say a word.
By the time I got through the crowd and off the ice he was long gone. I handed my boots back, and decided to walk around for a while to clear my head. The annoyance I felt started to turn to worry, was it his health? Was it his brothers? All I knew was something wasn’t right at all. I bought myself the fattest hot dog I could find and headed home to talk to Denise, she might know what was up with Nick. There was a huge flaw to that plan however, when I got back the place was empty. Not a soul to be seen, and no one was answering their phone. It was only a little after 7 but I’d had enough. I poured myself a large glass of Bailey’s on ice and went to bed. Tomorrow I was going to have it out with him and I needed all that help I could get.
I couldn’t even look at her after I got the call, I knew how she was feeling, but I had no choice but to go.
‘Joe, get everyone together, there’s a massive problem and I need everyone’s help right now’ I explained.
‘Central Park people called. There’s a severe weather warning for Christmas Day so they said if we want to have the wedding then it needs to be tomorrow and that means we need to rearrange everything now before everywhere closes. The food, the cake, the flowers, everything’ I explained.
‘Come to mine, I’ll get started’
‘On my way already’ I explained, wishing that this cab was a helicopter.