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Author's Chapter Notes:

"Should I give up

Or should I just keep chasing pavements?

Even if it leads nowhere

Or would it be a waste?
Even If I knew my place should I leave it there?
Should I give up
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere"



I shot up out of bed "Shit! Shit! Shit!" I needed to be up about an hour ago, now I had forty-five minutes to get ready and be across town to pick my sister up at the airport. I quickly through on the closest pair of sweatpants, not caring if they were clean or not, my tank top would have to do. I pulled my flowing brown hair back into a quick bun, then slipped my shoes on and ran out the door.  


"Chelsea! Chelsea over here!" The damn paparazzi already knew what hotel I checked into last night, I'm thinking the lady at the front desk tipped them off. "Where's Joe?" "Are you two still together?" "Is it true that you cheated on him" I pushed past them and hurried off to my car was already waiting for me.  

"How are you today Miss?" The drive asked as we started off down the road. He was an older guy, his hair was slowly turning gray, he was decently built.  


"I've had better days." I let out a small sigh and gazed out the window. "The airport please." 


We parked in front of the airport and there was my sister, bouncing towards my car. She was younger than me, only by two years but she was so much more carefree than me. If you didn't know us, you probably wouldn't think we were related let alone sisters. Her short blond hair fell about to her chin, she had piercing blue eyes, had very pale skin, and only stood be about 5' 4". As for me, I my chestnut brown hair fell to my mid back, I had chocolate brown eyes, I have darker complexion than she did, then finally I stood to be 5' 8".  


"Hi sis!" Jaime practically screamed as she slid into the back seat of the car. "Thank you for picking me up" 


"No problem at all. Thank you for coming." I called her late last night and begged her to come out to LA "I'm sure you had something to do. But you dropped it all for me." Instead of getting in the middle of it right now, she just placed her hand on my shoulder. 


"So, spill, what happened yesterday?" Jaime asked as she flopped down on my bed. "What did Joe do now?" 


"Same old, same old." I sat down beside her on the bed. "He got hammered drunk last night, started screaming at me. Telling me how worthless I am, how I hold him back. He was better before I came around and stole his spot light. Then, he started throwing everything. From the vase sitting beside the bed, from the bed itself." My eyes started watering, but I refused to cry over him. Not anymore, I'm done with his bull crap.  


"Chelsea, not that I'm not pissed at what he did to you. You know I can't stand him." She rolled her eyes. "But why were you even over there? You guys broke up months ago." Tears started to form in my eyes. I broke it off with Joe three weeks ago, but when he calls, I can't help myself I break down and go running. 


I met Joe Jonas when I was about 16. I had been in the business for a little over a year at that point, he was fresh on the scene. I was walking down the red carpet at the MTV movie awards, and Joe ran into me. He actually knocked me down on my butt, in front of everyone. I'm not sure who was more embarrassed him or me, but being a gentleman, he helped me up. Then from that moment on, I was in love with Joe Jonas. We exchanged numbers later that evening, and within two months we were never apart.  


For three years we had a perfect relationship. We had bought a house together the moment we turned eighteen, the first year of living together changed everything. Joe started partying more, at first it wasn't anything horrible. Then, he started doing drugs. I stopped that as soon as I could, but once I stopped the drugs, he began drinking heavier. I could barely remember that last time he was sober. He made less and less public appearances, because he couldn't stop drinking long enough.  


That's when I decided enough was enough. I told him he either needed to get help or I was gone. Joe looked me right in the face and told me to get out. My world was crushed, he chose alcohol over me.  Over everything we had, nothing matters to him. For the next two years, we were on and off. He never hit me, but his words hurt more than anything else.  


Finally, I decided I was done with Joe. I made an official statement to the press, saying Joe and I had gone our separate ways and I wished nothing but the best for him. I meant it, I was done with him and all his crap, I wanted to be happy and I wasn't happy with him anymore. Then, Joe called me. He was crying, he had just read my statement and he couldn't handle it. So, I caved, and went over last night.  


But by the time I got there he was drunker than I've ever seen him.  


I tried to help him, get him sobered up some. But I only made it worse, I sent him into one of his drunk fits. I ran out as fast as I got there. 


"Chelsea, I thought you were done with him? Why did you go there?" My sister tilted her head as she chewed on her bottom lip. 


"Well, I'm..." I avoided my sister's eyes; I could feel her blue eyes beaming at me. "pregnant." Jaime's arms wrapped around me before I even finished my sentence. Tears of joy where coming out of her eyes, I wish I felt the same.  


It was right after I broke things off with him, a month prior to my statement. I was stupid, and weak. I needed him; I love him. I've always loved him. That night he was saying all the right things, it was a rare time that he wasn't drinking. We fell back into our old ways. It was just like when we were happy and living together. I couldn't help myself; I made the first move. I kissed him, which he wasn't pulling away. One thing leads to another, and I woke up the next day naked in his bed. I got up and left before he could even wake up.  



But Joe...... he's not ready for a child. I'm just not sure what to do about Joe... 


Chapter End Notes:

I've wrote this, and rewritten it a couple of times. I hope you all like it!

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